Do you know a child who struggles to enjoy eating? Or are you a parent that goes into battle feeding your toddler? Mealtime problems can be a common toddler trait, but how do you know when it’s more than just a fussy phase? Or progresses right through to teen time? We asked this week’s dietitian expert for the latest Scoop on kids with tricky eating.
About our expert: Denise Stapleton is an Accredited Practising Dietitian with 27 years experience in paediatric nutrition and research. She passionately supports families with varying mealtime difficulties and therapeutic dietary needs as a private practitioner, senior community dietitian, researcher, author and mentor. Denise has training in Picky Eaters vs Problem Feeders: The Sequential Oral Sensory (SOS) Approach to Feeding and Making SENSE of the Senses. Denise has partnered with Gillian Griffiths an Occupational Therapist with extensive training in Sensory Processing, to publish the go-to parent guide book Sense-ational Mealtimes and Facebook page.
“He won’t eat fruit”. “He will only eat food in packets”. “She turns food over and over before putting it in her mouth”. “He has to have the same food in his lunch box every day, all separate and gets upset if one thing touches another”. Do these phrases sound familiar? Do you have a tricky eater? Eating can seem like a simple behaviour, when in fact one in two infants and toddlers are reported by their parents to have feeding problems. Fussy or picky eating usually passes after a few months. However, mealtimes for some families are fraught with ongoing grimacing, gagging, distress, anxiety, worry, frustration and anger in their children. What causes mealtime difficulties? There is a long list of reasons that can trigger things not going to plan and trigger a tricky eater. Premature or complicated birth, early hospitalisation, medical or developmental conditions, pain, trauma, excessive stress, reflux, vomiting, ear, throat or chest infections, allergies, intolerances, and constipation are some of the conditions that can contribute to complex mealtimes. Mealtimes can be tricky for some families if a parent experiences post-natal depression, anxiety or stress of any kind. One of the key areas to explore, in conjunction with a health professional assessment, is your child’s sensory preferences for mealtimes. What are sensory preferences? Sensory preferences are the sights, sounds, types of touch, smells, tastes, temperatures, textures and types of movement we prefer in our day. Our sensory preferences influence what we detect, tolerate, are distracted or distressed by, avoid, or seek more of.
Exercise: Think back to a memory of your favourite meal. Where were you, who were you with, what happened, what did you eat, how did you eat it, how did it make you feel and what do you remember?
Sensory preferences are unique to each individual as they are based on: sensory thresholds in the brain; genes; the surrounding environment; feelings; interactions and experiences during each day and across a lifetime (ie memories). On top of this, pain, stress, trauma, fatigue, reflux, vomiting, infections, allergies, intolerances and constipation can make a parent or a child more or less sensitive. Discovering sensory preferences takes time as we may have a different threshold for each sense and the amount of sensory information we avoid, tolerate or seek more of can change during the day. Parents can also project their own sensory preferences onto to their children. How do sensory preferences affect mealtime behaviour? During mealtimes we use EVERY sense to help us notice, be calm, interact with others, socialise, be seated, use utensils (or not) and finally to eat. We continually use our senses to gather sensory information from our surroundings and our body in order to ensure our mealtimes are emotionally safe, successful and enjoyable. 
Photo: Courtesy of Blogger Lisa from Gestational Diabetes Recipes who is fab at family meal inspiration. Our sensory preferences directly influence our thoughts, feelings, memories, interactions with others and our behaviour. If our brain detects or remembers an experience that feels unsafe, worrisome or dangerous, our body might experience a Danger Centre Response (fight, flight, freeze or fright). These strong feelings might be associated with the sensory properties of certain foods, the surroundings or interactions and can have a very large impact on mealtime behaviour.
Exercise: Can you remember eating a food that caused you to feel unwell or vomit? Can you tolerate the smell, sight, taste or texture of that food now? How does it make you feel? What would you do if you were forced to eat even just a little bit? How would you behave?
How can I help my child feel safe at snack and mealtimes? 
You can support your child’s ability to stay calm by taking time to SENSE-itively tune in to his or her cues. When you tune in to your child’s sensory preferences, you can create a ‘just right’ experience that will feel emotionally safe for everyone and hopefully bring pleasure. Ongoing pleasurable mealtimes can positively shape a child’s mealtime behaviour and the types or range of food he will eat. We have had very positive feedback from parents about how our book, Sense-ational Mealtimes has helped them along this journey.
Editor’s comment: Thanks Denise. I’m fascinated by sensory research and genetics. In my family when the Brussels sprouts come out, my Miss 12 and I say “oh yum” but Master 10 and Mr Surfer Dude don’t look anywhere near as pleased! How about you lovelies? Do you have a happy relationship with eating in your household? What do you do to create it? If you have a question for Denise we’d love to hear from you below too.
